I want to be.....

Walking home from dropping off the boys to school, I couldn't help but stare at my shadow. I was really drawn to it and quite honestly, I just liked how it made me look. Tall and lean.

Oh to be tall.  If I were tall I would not require the use of chairs or step stools to reach above the refridgerator. I would probably feel more comfortable playing sports like volleyball or basketball. I wouldn't have to stand on my tippy toes to kiss my husband. I would be able to walk as fast as my husband! My oldest son would have years to catch up to my height instead of months. But I am not tall. I am short. And that is okay. I am closer to my children. I can play hide and seek easier. I don't require a lot of leg room on an airplane. :D Jealous?? You should be!

Oh to be lean. If I were lean I would not be so self conscious in the fitting rooms. I would not care what people thought of me. I would not have to work as hard as I am now on my health. I would be a positive role model to my boys and their friends. I would be happy. But I am not lean.

STOP! Hear the screeching of the brakes??  I know I am not lean yet. But when I do get lean, I am pretty sure I will still feel self conscious in the fitting rooms. I would still care what people thought of me. I would have to work just as hard, if not harder to maintain my health. I already am a positive role model for my boys and their friends because I am working on being healthier better me.  And happy...pft...I am already happy.

I think overweight people have the common misconception that all problems magically disappear in their life once they are skinny. When in fact it can't be further from the truth. I used to have that mentality. 'When I get skinny, my life will be so much better. I won't get picked on or made fun of. I'll have a boyfriend. I'll have this and I'll have that. I will be popular.' Blah blah blah!  Did I ever get skinny with that mentality? Well no. Why? Because I wanted what some else had and I was trying to achieve it for all the wrong reasons. I was seeing what society wanted me to see instead of looking at it from a healthy perspective.

I can't speak for the skinny/lean people of the world as I have never been one. But I do have a lot friends that are and they seem have the same self conscious issues I do, just from a different perspective. I used to roll my eyes and get mad everytime I would hear someone smaller than me say they are fat. My husband is famous for that. But they have their own perspective on what suits them. On how they choose to be healthy.

We all are made up of the same ingredients we just end up being shaped differently. It isn't a bad thing. It's a beautiful thing. Be proud of who you are and show confidence in what you have. Life doesn't get better when you get leaner or if you are trying to get curvier. It gets better because you make the choices in life to make it better. You have the power and you have the control to make your life and your body what you want it to be. Me... I want to be the best ME that I can be! I want to be healthy and a good role model for my children. That's what it comes down to for me. Not the dress size or the ability to wear a bikini. Just an all around good healthy positive role model for my three boys.

Small changes add up

I was packing the boys' lunch for school this morning and I started to think about how much I have changed since the days where I carried a lunch to school. A sandwhich, chips, fruit and a little debbie cake of some sort. For years I thought that was the norm. It's not necessarily bad, but it's not good either.  During that time, my parents never once took the time to teach me about good eating habits or provided us with enough healthy alternatives to know the difference. Dinners were rarely well balanced and I had no idea what portion control meant either. My Dad was Italian, so we ate like Italians. Tack this onto the emotional eating and we have an obese gal since elementary school. Ack!

I don't want history repeating itself. I want better for my boys and I want to give them the knowledge and the tools for them to make healthy decisions for themselves. To do that, I need to set good examples. I need to educate them as I educate myself and I need to provide them with the tools and ingredients to ensure they have the healthy options. I rarely keep junk in the house anymore. I provide them with plenty of fruit and veggie choices that we sometimes look like we have our own produce stand in the kitchen. I know I am doing right by them when they jump for joy because I put cucumbers and tomatoes in with their lunch instead of pretzels or something. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with putting it their box once in awhile, but everyday? No...no necessary.

Over the years I have made great strides to make positive changes in my eating habits and to be a good role model for my growing boys. Teaching them lessons about portion control and that Mommy is on a journey to be a healthier me. I know I am getting through when we go out and they choose a veggie or fruit over french fries. They don't always, and that is okay, because I don't always either. All things in moderation. I am a firm believer in that.

I will admit, I am not always perfect. There are times I will cave and go for convienance over healthy.  However, I am at the point where I start to feel guilty. I was reaching for animal crackers to add to the lunch boxes. I stopped myself and that's when I went to the fridge to pick up the cucumber and grape tomatoes. Got my fancy cutter out for them and made cucumber crinkle chips. Only took a minute. And to see them jump for joy and the smiles on their faces when I told them what was in their box, made it all worth it!

Small changes. Baby steps. One foot infront of the other. Then one day you turn around and see that all those little changes have added up. Something simple as changing from white to wheat, whole milk to low fat and from regular sodas to diet. Sticking with the small changes add up to big results one day. Not just for you, but for the ones around you that love and hold dear.

Track! Remember to track!

Last night an old friend came over for dinner. I started talking to her about WW and showed her some of my books and a little bit of etools. Just introducing her a little to the WW lifestyle and what I like about it. I told her how when I am diligent with my tracking I can't go wrong. I will lose. Even if I have a week where I am not making the best choices with my food intake. It's when I get out the tracking and think I can do it on my own, that is when I fail. I either don't lose anything and stay the same weight as my last weigh in, or I gain.

After she left I did my tracking for the day and I started to think more about it. Then my leader's words this past meeting were ringing in my head again. 'Are you a fulltime member? Or a part time member?' I have already established that for awhile I was the part time member for months just because of all the chaos in my life. But even though I vowed that I was going make it a priority to be a fulltime member, was I?  I went back into my logs for the past few days to double check myself and see how my tracking was doing. I have tracked everyday since that last meeting. Was it accurate? No. Every bit of food, licks and nibbles were accounted for, but I failed to keep up with that little bottom right hand corner of healthy checks for water, fruits/veggies, healthy oils and vitamins. I also don't track my activity. I never had as I didn't want to see the extra points and give myself permission to eat them. But I am realizing I need to.

WW makes it so easy for us not to fail, and yet I find myself losing focus and failing. It's always when I don't track. Tracking does work. I know it does. Why is it so easy to lose track though?? Last week I missed everyday of tracking. So needless to say, I wasn't surprised when I stepped on the scale and gained a pound and a half. I can't blame anyone but myself for that. But I also can't beat myself up. I just need to pick myself up, just myself off and get back to it. It doesn't matter how many times you fall. What matters is that you pick yourself up and you continue on. It shows your strength, determination and your passion to reaching your goal.

So what am I going to do to make sure I stay focused and track everything. Including my activity from now on, well that is the tricky part. I am just going to have to take it one day at a time. One meal at a time and one work out at a time. I think I will sprinkle a few reminders aroung the house to remind me to track. Like leaving the WW window up on the computer all day so it's in my face when I open it up. Leaving the WW magazine out in plain sight, have a few tracker books lying around in the kitchen and work out areas of my house. I think I will have my husband bug me to to make sure I track. I also have a few friends that are posting in the group about tracking to. Always super helpful! Love those ladies! :)

I know WW doesn't work for everyone, and I am not pushing it on anyone. I am also not getting paid to advertise for them and they have no part inme writing this blog. These are just my own thoughts and opinions on it. :) It works for me and I really like it. So I am going to stick with it!

Support...it's important! You do have it!

In life, how do you acheive your goals and dreams? Do you do it all on your own or is it with the help of those you hold dear to you? If you say you made it all on your own, I would have to call you out on that in disbelief. You are not alone in this world and someone along the way supported you. Cheered for you. Cried with you and laughed with you. Everyone has at least one person in their life to help them, guide them and support them. Everyone. Even if you don't see it at the time.

When it comes to weight loss, having love and support is a must. From your friends, family and even your co-workers. You won't succeed if everyone is not on the same page and they know what you are reaching for. I started my weight loss journey while my husband was deployed. I changed so much with this deployment, I was nervous how we would reintergrate back together with all the healthy changes I have been making. My husband is the type that could and would live on soft pretzels, pizza rolls, bagel bites, rice krispie treats, frosted flakes and Mountain Dew. No joke! I think I just gained 15 pounds typing that crap! lol I was nervous he would expect my cooking, shopping and ordering at a restaurant to magically go back to the way I used to. I was also afraid I would give into temptation myself and just fall back into old habits when he returned.

I was wrong. Our move across the country went smoothly and to be honest, even though I indulged here and there, my husband took my want and need to be healthy into consideration many times. It was little things here and there that made me realize he supported me and was on board with helping me succeed in reaching my goal. He is helpful. He is considerate. He knows when to push and he knows when to back off. Even if I don't realize it at the time. He keeps grounded and in check and helps me to see things in a different way that I may not have thought of on my own. We tend to bicker about groceries though. It's really nothing new. I think we always will. He is penny pincher. We are complete opposites and I can be stubborn. But when I set my stubborness asside and really look or hear at what it is he is saying or doing, I always end up grateful and saying he was right. (Not always to him...shhhh don't ever tell him. I will deny it! ;) lol)

Last night I was doing dishes and he was asking me about dinner and points and stuff. I look up and my etools window was up. He was tracking dinner for me. Put a smile on my heart and on my face. I miss the support like crazy I was getting with the girls in Washington. Don't get me wrong, I still get it and each of them still are huge inspirations. But with every move comes change. And I was afraid the change was not going to be helpful to my weight loss goals. Last night that changed. Seeing my husband take the time to do that was awesome. It put a smile on my heart and my face. He has my back on this and is willing to help out in anyway he can. Even if he has to be the bad guy and tell me no chocolate for you tonight!

I am truly grateful and blessed to have my husband. We have definitely come a long way over the years. He is my best friend. He has my back and he supports me in everything I do and to see him step up and to see all the things, little or big, he does to help me maintain my success on this journey just warms my heart. I can't fail with him by my side. Or with all the other cheerleaders I have.

We all need at least one person. One person we can rely on to tell it like it is. To listen to you even when you aren't speaking. To hold your hand when times are rough and to smack it when you are out of line. Even on this journey. We all know it's not Rainbows and flowers every day on this journey. Who is yours? Is it your spouse? A friend? Your Mom? You may have more people than you realize that are there for you. That are helping you and you don't realize it. You have your own cheering section! I am sure of it! As I am one of them! Go you! You are so worth it! :)

plan. Plan. PLAN!!!

I am always more successful when I plan ahead! So this weekend, I thought I would organzie myself a little and plan meals for the week. One more step to ensure I am on track and stay there!!! I had my nifty menu planning pad, pen, cookbooks and laptop all ready! I got so into it I was up until 2:30 on Saturday. WOWSERS! I got lost in blogs and cookbooks drooling over what looked like yumminess galore!

I had my menu for the week. I know what I was going to make for the kids' lunches, what plan B's would be and what the littlest one and I would eat while the rest of the gang was away during the day. I even planned out what our breakfast would be at 2:30 in the morning while I was throwing it in the crockpot! MAN I love that crockpot. My husband and I are thinking of picking up a second one one of these days.

What I should have done to was calculate all of my ppv while I was making the menu for the week. Something I will have to remember for next weekend. Next weekend I vow to have a full stomach, and to do it during daylight hours! lol I was dragging on Sunday with the lack of sleep. And sleep these days is really hard to catch up on.

I planned for a day out with friends today as well. A few of us are meeting for lunch at a local restaraunt. I looked at the menu. I know exactly what I am getting and what the ppv will be for the entire meal. The trick is to stick with the plan. How will I do that. Hmmmm well I won't look at the menu and I breath through my mouth so I don't smell anything that may make me weak and order differently! lol

Plan. Plan. Plan. You can't ever plan to much. There are tons of different ways to plan your meals to help keep you on track. Google it! My problem sometimes though is I start to plan, then walk away from it to come back to it and have it not come out as successful as if I had just stuck with it all along! A weakness. One I am working on! Always a work in progress and I am okay with that. It only makes me a better me! :)

How do you plan? Have any tips or tricks up your sleeve?  Feel free to share! :)

Inspired!

I didn't make my normal WW meeting this week and went to a different one this morning. Man I was bawling like a baby. It was a very vocal group. Everyone was sharing stories. Some were success stories. Some weren't. No matter what type of story, these people had passion. They had love. Whichever way their story went, I was moved and inspired. The leader cracked me up. She could probably get a gig at a comedy club. She has so much love for her regulars and totally made newbies like myself so welcomed. Her words 'Are you going to be a full time or a part time WW member' are ringing in my ears still a few hours later. I can honestly say, I have only been a part timer for the last I can't even tell you how many months. I need to fix that. I want to fix that. Putting myself back to basics to get reaqquanted with everything. Old tools are coming out and reminders are being planted everywhere to help keep me in focus. This meeting I can't help but think was meant for me to go to today. I needed to hear what these wonderful people had to say. I needed to meet this leader. A few came up to me and gave me such encouragement, warmth and even a few hugs. I am so glad I got my but up and out the door in time to go. These people were so sweet and so welcoming. This is what I needed. What a wonderful way to start out my new WW week and my weekend! I am so blessed!

Reality Check!

Today started out as a great day. The sun was shining and I was in a terrific mood with the "Going to knock out everything on my to do list!' attitude. Then I decided I would practice what I preach a little and do a progress photo. I was all excited. I put on the same outfit that started it all. I tried and tried and TRIED to take a decent photo of myself. It so was not happening. Every shot looked like a mug shot! Shouldn't I be smiling for this?? I mean I have come a LONG way since December. I was trying to take this in our little teeny tiny downstairs bathroom (Gotta love the mirror shots) so I decided I would set up my trusty old tripod instead and take it that way. Still wasn't thrilled with any of the fifty shots I took. But settled in on a few contenders anyways.

Side by side of the one from today and the one from december....I see quite the difference. Toned up quite a bit, and definitely smaller! However when you add in my progress pic I did in February, well that's when my heart just sank. I didn't see much change at all. I know with the stress of the cross country move, having three kids, homecoming and well just life in general I should be proud that I still managed to lose weight even when not tracking. But it's just depressing to see first hand such little change.

I'll be honest. I cried a little bit. Let my guard down. Grabbed a bag (smacking my hand now!) of veggie stix and sat infront of a different computer and started thumbing through various pictures. Not paying attention to how many I chowed down. Moment of weakness. A moment of being ashamed. A moment of self destruction.

I'll tell you what. I am not happy with myself for that move! But I just do what I tell everyone else. Pick myself up. Dust myself off. Refocus! One little set back, moment of weakness will not prevent me from reaching my goal.

What can I learn from this today? Well, even though I have come a long way, I still have a ways to go. I am only human for having a moment of weakness, but to sit here and reflect on this only a few hours later with this kind of attitude proves I am stronger than I sometimes give myself credit for. I decided I wasn't going to let this ruin my day. I wasn't going to post the pictures, but I have decided that it is a good reality check for me. It's long over due and it will just push me harder to get to my goal. As well as a way to let go of the bad emotions I had of myself today.

Well there you have it. The imperfect me working hard on a change for a healthier better me. Slow and steady does it. Wonder what I will look like at my one year mark?

You are more than that number!

Inspiration from this post came from a friend last night expressing her frustrations with the scale not showing results. I have been there. Many many MANY times myself. That scale is an awful piece of machinary! There are days I despise it and want to throw it out the window. For a while I had to hide it. I was obsessed. I was checking morning, noon and night! Not good. It plays with your head. You become chained to that scale and letting that scale define who you are. When in fact you are not that number that scale flashes at you. You are so much more than that. You are beautiful. You are kind. You are unique. You are loved for who you are and not by the number that that scale reflects.

Stepping on that scale and seeing no change is frustrating. I completely understand that. I still have days where if I step on the scale and see a number I don't like I feel a little bummed. But I turn to the mirror and just look at myself. My face has thinned out. Wow! My short sleeve shirts look longer. Jeans are looser. I then proceed to get a few activity points in by doing some standing abs exercise, maybe use the sink for push ups...I am serious! You laugh, but I do. And I some how feel better and forget about that number and move on with my day. Because I know, that even though that scale says one number, I still know that I have other changes going on that reflect that hard work I am doing. Like loss of inches, eating healthier and my mental health. Not to mention the fact I am setting a much healthier lifestyle for my children and becoming a much better role model and Mom for them. It makes all the difference.

Weight loss does not happen over night. And during every weight loss journey, you hit a plateau where your body just stops losing. But don't give up. Use it as a challenge to maintain. A challenge to try something new. A challenge to spice up your meals and try new things. A challenge to find new inspiration. A challenge to pay it forward and encourage someone else who is struggling.

Some things I have also done in the past to help me reach goals, hang a piece of clothing that is too small in your bathroom or bedroom in plain sight that you will see everyday. Now don't get to crazy and make it a few sizes, one size down will do. Baby steps! ;) (Do a before pic and a current one side by side. I have been thinking of doing a current one here pretty soon myself.) You don't have to show the world if you don't want to. It's just so you can see for yourself the changes you have undertaken. We see ourselves in the mirror EVERYDAY! We don't notice the small changes like everyone else. So it's good to once in awhile do a side by side comparison. I set up a photo shoot for myself as I had mention last week. That really was an awesome experience. Don't feel like doing a boudoir, that's okay. What about a glam session in a pretty dress? It's a way to celebrate you. To capture you to show you how everyone else sees the beautiful you!

Weight loss has it's ups and it's downs. The key is to not look at it as a diet. It's a lifestyle change! You are changing your ways and your habits for a healthier you! Don't let that scale define you. You are awesome! You are beautiful! You are are so much more than that number! :)

Random Rant....

I should start off and reiterate the fact I have no education in weightloss other than my own life experiences. I am not a Doctor, dietician or a nutritionist. I am not advertising for anyone, and what I may have mentioned or will about any product/program is of my own opinion and what has may or may not worked for me on my weight loss journey. No one is paying me. I write this as a way to keep myself in check, hold myself accountable and if I help a few along the way that's a bonus! :) What works for me, may not work for you. Find what works for you and can't stress enough to be kind to you and treat you and your body right! Talk to your Doctor. Get the facts, Ask questions and take your time and educate yourself.

 I was driving to the store last night to pick up some things and I over heard a commercial for a new prescription drug for weight loss. It's geared towards the 40 plus women who have hit menopause, don't want to exercise or diet that have gained weight. I can't tell you how much that commercial just got on my nerves. Weight loss pills have always struck a nerve with me though to be honest.

Yes I know that weight loss is hard. And finding the right healthy balance of diet and exercise can be done. It's just a matter of taking the time to find what works for you. That's just my opinion. I am sure some who may read this who don't know me, may think that I have never really had to lose a considerable amount of weight. Well I am putting out there that yes I have. I at one point in my life I was pushing almost 300lbs. I was able to lose almost 150lbs of that through following the WW plan on my own. It took time. Discipline. Changing and a lot of growing. Then I started having kids and depression hit and I gained most of what I lost back because I lost focus. I currently have about 100lbs more to go to make it to my goal weight currently.  There I said it out loud. Well it's in black and white now at least.

There have been several times I have thought about buying the pills, liquids, shakes and sprinkles to help with my weight loss. But then I start to think what is it that is in that stuff to curb your appetite or what exactly is it that cuts the fat?  And then what happens after you stop taking it? Do you gain it all back. Well yes, I think you do. Because you are using all this stuff to curb your eating habits, that you lose your eating habits. When you try to start eating again, you gain weight. Then you get mad so you go out and repeat the cycle of buying their products. It's all a scheme in my opinion.

Now I also do know, that sometimes people do need help for whatever reason. Something is not working and they need that help. I get that. I've even had discussions with my Doctors. That's the key. Be responsible and have conversations with your doctor and truly listen to their suggestions and do them. Really put the effort in and try 200% at whatever advice you are given. Because if you don't put in the effort, how do you really know it didn't work?  Because maybe it would have, if you just had tried. Be honest with yourself and with your Doctor. If your not, you don't have anyone to blame but yourself.

I am not trying to stir up controversy. These are just my opinions and how I see things. Weight loss isn't a quick fix. You didn't gain all this weight overnight, so you can't expect it to come off overnight. Slow and steady wins the race. 

I should reiterate the fact I have no education in weightloss other than my own life experiences. I am not a Doctor, dietician or a nutritionist. I am not advertising for anyone, and what I may have mentioned about any product is of my own opinion and what has may or may not worked for me on my weight loss journey. No one is paying me. I write this as a way to keep myself in check, hold myself accountable and if I help a few along the way that's a bonus! :) What works for me, may not work for you. Find what works for you and can't stress enough to be kind to you and treat you and your body right! Talk to your Doctor. Get the facts, Ask questions and take your time and educate yourself.

What are your thoughts on quick fix diet pills, potions and sprinkles?  Do you think they work? Do you need to be a loyal buyer in order for you to keep the weight off?

Pumpkin mania!!!!

It's starting! The fall season! Know how I know? For the past week I have been enjoying my favorite fall flavor! Pumpkin!! I LOVE pumpkin!!! Pumpkin coffee! Pumpkin Butter on my pumpernickel bread! Pumpkin soup! Pumpkin seeds! Pumpkin oatmeal! Even Pumpkin Waffles!!! MMMmmm!!! Pumpkin! =D I'm on the hunt for some fantastic skinny pumpkin recipes today as well as conjuring up my own!! What's your favorite fall flavor? What do you make with it?

YES! We ARE smaller than we appear!

I don't buy new stuff for me often. When I do buy something new, it's because it's for something specific these days. In fact, most of the pants I still wear, well they are all to big on me. Or they will fit great for the first few hours after departing the dryer, but after that, it's all down hill from there! My shirts are also to big and make me appear to be larger than what I am as well. It's funny as I remember a time where all I wanted to wear was to big for me shirts to hide the massive rolls I have going on here there and everywhere on my body.

Well last week after my WW meeting, I made a stop at old navy on the hunt for bottoms. That is what I really need. I normally LOVE Old Navy jeans, but I wasn't feeling it. Instead I was digging the yellow stuff I was seeing. Yellow shirts, yellow jacket, yellow dress and yes there was even a yellow pair of pants. I almost went for them, but decided against. I ended up leaving there where just a few things. Two tops, a dress and a pair of pants that are actually to small for me. Oh well...I'll fit in them soon enough!

I wore my new tops this weekend at my Mother in Law's. She complimented me on my yellow one!  Made me all sorts of happy! My hubby's not feeling the sunshine with yellow so I shot him the 'I told you so look' and a big grin! =D  The next day I wore the other one and WOW! It's just your basic baseball style 3/4 length shirt. Cream with a bright pink sleeves. I really should have taken a picture, because I seriously felt like a million bucks in that shirt. All because it showed of my body. The right size of my body. And I could see it!

I always tend to see myself as big. The big pushing 300 pounds big with muffin rolls, crescent rolls and any other kind of rolls you can think of.  And it's not me trying to be hard on myself, it's what I see when I look in the mirror. Several times I have heard out here from loved ones how great I look. I tend to roll my eyes or find a way to tell them that I don't. Because when I look in the mirror I still see the old me most days. It's funny how our mind plays tricks on us. We never see ourselves the way everyone else sees us.

I did a Boudoir photo shoot a few months back. I did it as a present for my husband, but mostly, it was for me. It was a way for me to see just how far I came on my weightloss journey. I had a goal in mind of where I wanted to be weight wise. However I didn't make it. But I was okay with that. My Photographer was amazing. I was so nervous but she quickly helped ease my nerves. We had such a funtime with all my different outfits and she even handled my snorting! About a week later I had the link to the most AMAZING slide show I have ever seen. One image that stuck out and still sticks out was an image of my legs. I hate my legs. They are short with fat calves and fat thighs. Well that's how I thought I saw them. In all actuality, they are pretty rocking legs and I have the pictures to prove it. ;)

My point to all this is, and you may have already guessed because you are smart like that! ;) Even though you may not see the change in you, there is a change. If you are getting a compliment, there is a good reason. It's true! Love it! Own it! You deserve it! You have worked so hard and it's showing! I need to be better on this myself.  I will also probably be  living in that new shirt now for a while. I highly recommend going out and getting a new shirt. One that fits you correctly to show off just exactly all the work you have been doing! It really helped to see the me I am now and put a bounce in my step yesterday! Nothing got me down. It was a GREAT day. Heck it was a GREAT weekend! How was yours?

Licks, nibbles and sips....

It's funny how all the little things add up. The little lick here. A nibble there. A sip here. It's like if we only do a little bit, it doesn't count. I try to be good and alot 2-3 sometimes 4points depending on the day for the licks, nibbles and sips. But I must admit I don't always remember. I need to be better about that because everything counts! I need to be better about my tracking habits too! Need to practice what I have been preaching to people!  I know it works and I do so much better when I am on top of my game! I have slacked a little these past two days and have left a few holes. But on a positive note.....it's been a successful week for weightloss!!!! :D  That won't always be the case though if I am consistantly leaving holes in my tracking!

Sleep...the miracle drug!

It's amazing how good you feel after a good nights rest. For the first time in a long time it seems I was sleeping before 10pm and woke up at 6:30am. That's aMAZing!!! Not to mention felt amazing too. Wow...that's a lot of amazings! ;)

Sleep is something that requires such little effort but makes a huge impact on our bodies. When we get a good nights sleep we are well rested and ready to take on the day. When you don't sleep, you are sluggish and in my case moody. Very moody! My poor family! It's also no surprise that it effects our weight and our metabolism too. Sleep! If I were a doctor...I would order more of it! I don't think I get nearly enough. But isn't that what happens when we have kids? I need to make a better effort of going to bed at a decent hour everynight. I know it does wonders for me. Mind and body!

Facebook and mountains oh my!

I love Facebook. Don't get me wrong, there are many times I despise it, but for the most part, I love it. Especially these days. It helps keep me connected to family and friends near and far. It has games, which I will admit isn't always good, but sometimes brainless activity is nice when the children are occupied. But the thing that I really love about it is what you can find. There are hidden gems everywhere that people have posted. Whether it's a quote or a picture, you are able to see at least one thing to help encourage, motivate and or inspire you.

Today no exception and I am so glad I found it when I did. A friend on Facebook posted a photo of someone at the top of a giant hill with the title 'Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting....so get on your way!' Love it!

I need to apply this type of attitude to me everyday. Plaster these gems all over the house or something. These past few weeks have been an emotional roller coaster for me. You can probably tell just with the few posts I have posted here. Adjusting out here has been a bit harder on me than I thought it would be. It helps that I have a few friends already here, but I can't expect them to hold my hand everyday to face this place. I need to find the courage and the inner strength to do it on my own. So if it means taking these hidden gems I am finding on Facebook and plastering them all over my house to inspire, motivate and encourage, well then that is just what I am going to do. A dear friend just wrote last night that I am worth it. And I am! I know I am. Time to go claim my mountain today and see what it brings! What will yours bring?

It's not always rainbows and flowers....

What do you do when the sun is shining bright outside, but on your inside it's no so bright? You are tired. You're sad, lonely and frustrated. You're not seeing the results you think you should be seeing. You think it's so easy for everyone around you to be skinny or it's so easy for that person to lose weight. You then start to doubt yourself and discourage yourself even more. A cloud forms over you and soon it's just a monsoon of negative thoughts and emotions raining over you. You wallow in a puddle of low self esteem and self pity. How do you get out of that? What steps can you take to pull yourself out of that negative storm and bring yourself back to the light where you are more positive, caring and kind to yourself?

Loosing weight is not easy. For anyone. Whether you are 20 pounds over weight or over 100 pounds over weight. The thoughts and emotions are all the same for all of us. It's a complete roller coaster ride. Many days you feel on top of the world and that you got this. Then there are days where even though it's sunny, it's all just really dark. I have had many days like this in the past. Lately it seems as though I am starting to kind of just get blah with myself. It's funny how our emotions can change overnight! I am still tracking. I am still active. Not as much as I used to be in Washington, but I am moving. I can't quite put my finger on it. Okay so actually I do wjay my malfunction is. I can't change it but what I can do is accept it and move on and not let it consume me. 

It's definitely not always rainbows and flowers. Somedays are better and easier than others. You just need to remember what your goal is and why it is you want to acheive it. Once you remember, you can refocus. I remember my goal. I see why I want to acheive that goal everyday with my little guys and my husband. Time to refocus. Time to snap out of the blahness and create new challenges for myself to acheive my goal. Just need to keep moving forward and not look back. Unless if it's to see just how far I have come. 

Don't hide under the covers!

What a wonderful weekend I had! My Sisters came down for a visit. So good to see them after almost two years. A lot has happened in that two years and I can't tell you how happy I am to see them happy and healthy! I love them dearly!!

One of things we love to do together is go to the Zoo. What a great time we had. Lots of laughs. Lots of walking and lots of animals. One of my favorites was this this guy.

 

He had the sweetest yet saddest face. Snapped quite a few of him...and the giraffes. But that's a different story. Anyways, I posted this pic to my facebook page  a little bit ago attached with 'Don't let the Monday Blues get you down! Put a smile on your face and make it a great day! :)' Kind of fitting. On Mondays, most people just want to crawl under the blankets and hide from the world. Not ready to accept the fact that the weekend is over and must wake up and face the world head on. When we were kids it was school we didn't want to face. Now as adults..the work week. We're never happy. Notice that? We always want some we don't or can't have. Again...a post for another time.

 

As I sit and look at this picture some more, I can't help but think how funny. This should be me hiding under the blanket. Not because it is Monday, but because well, I over did it this weekend having lots of great food and some not so great for me but tasted ever so great. I am not trying to be hard on myself by any means. I just think that it's funny that even less than a year ago, if I had a weekend like this I would be this guy. Hiding under the blanket and feeling all bad about myself. Asking myself 'Why did I eat that?' 'You're never going to lose weight eating like that!'  'I ruined myself, so might as well go have some more junk!' Sound familiar? We truly are our own worst critics.

 

Where does it get us to be so hard on ourselves? No where. The negative thoughts feed the negative emotions and just make us feel worse. When we feel so bad and so low, we just curl up into a ball and hide from the world. Literally and figuratively. Not to mention lose track of our goal of weightloss and tend to overindulge more. Now I will be honest, I did say a few times, 'Man I shouldn't have this.' But at the same time, I am a firm believer of all things in moderation. Okay so maybe I indulged in one to many Pumpkin Munchkins. But I am okay. I know I won't be having days like I did this weekend everyday. I know I won't have weekends like that every time. I actually feel the difference now when my body has had to much junk. When I eat right and treat my body right, my body is happy. I can actually feel the happiness. I know. I know. I sound like a crazy loon. But it is so true. I am perky. I am happy. I am energetic. I have a good attitude and body itself feels all tingly. (Wait you don't get the tingly? Maybe I am a crazy loon!) All when I am eating right. When I don't, I am tired and sluggish and have no energy. Not to mention the cranky attitude to go with it!

 

So if you had a weekend of over indulgence. Don't hide from it. Don't get all hard on yourself. Accept it. Move on. Take the covers off your head and walk it off with your head held high. Positive thoughts=Positvie Results! You are human. You have the right and you have the control to make your day what you want it to be. Keep track and keep moving forward. You totally can! Have a GREAT day! :)

Practice makes perfect!

That's what I tell my boys everyday as well as to keep trying until you are happy with the results. Something I realize that I need to apply to myself more often. I tend to wait for the last minute and hope for the best with my results. Sometimes it's fabulous. Sometimes it's 'WHAT ON EARTH KM!!!' True story! Why you ask? Well I am a procrastinator. I try like heck to not be, but sometimes, I just can't help it. I have been like this forever. That and I run on my own time zone too. Me and on time very rarely exist. For those that know me, know this is true. If you don't, just ask my Moms.

So why a post on this...well earlier this week I decided I would talk to my Housing complex about volunteering to do some Zumba classes. Residents can bring canned goods and we would add it to our Food drive for the local food shelter. I was all excited. I was going to do this and get back into a good fitness routine. Something I have been lacking for the last few months with the move. So I talked to My Girl K to see what we needed to do te get this going. Well as the week has progressed, I have been getting more and more nervous. Seriously what was I thinking? Am I ready? Like really really ready? Am I fit enough to be up front for a full hour a few times a week? No. Not after my almost 2 month hiatis off my normal routine. But I need to be. So today I am practicing because practice makes perfect! Mind you I am not aiming to be the perfect Zinstructor. Just the best that I can be. And I am okay with that.

So time for you get up and go practice something in the activity department. Maybe it's Zumba, maybe it's step aerobics or weights. Maybe it's just being a kid again and playing on the monkey bars. Whatever you choose to go practice today, make sure you smile and you have fun!

Welcome

Well if you are reading this, Welcome! I am tickled pink you stopped to see what I may have to say. :) I have blogged several times before and each one has been geared to what is going on at that particular time or an interest in my life. It never really stuck. This time around, and I plan on sticking with it, it is about my weightloss journey. It's a struggle and I find it's a lot easier to go through when you have someone else, even better an entire group that knows what it's like and shares the ups and downs. I have met a great group of ladies. A few had suggested I start a blog about my journey. I had to put it on the back burner for awhile as I had a cross country move to get ready for. It was a crazy move. But it's all done now. Well for the most. I still have boxes everywhere, but slowly they will disappear. Kind of like the pounds I lug around. Slow and steady. I could go on and on...but I think I will stop here for now. You see it took most of the day to try and create this. It's really hard with a toddler running around. And now, well everyone is home now. So more tomorrow! Have a good night and remember...track. Track. TRACK!